My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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