That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Randomize
