some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Randomize