you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
