so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The power of my boobs compel you
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
