At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
