that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
We have started to decorate penises.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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