Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
