There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
now i know why i became what i already was.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
