our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
How external is "for external use only"?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
