Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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