Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
