y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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