so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
