Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Randomize