I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
