have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
