I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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