Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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