Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Dude i fell asleep inside of her

(1-248): View more from Michigan

thats awesome

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(407): View more from Florida

It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career

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(718): View more from New York

you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.

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(647): View more from Ontario

I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.

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(419): View more from Ohio

He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..

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(850): View more from Florida

Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.

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