Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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