Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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