Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
