if i can run in heels then i can drive
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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