And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
