Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize