i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Still dying that you shit outside
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
