distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
