I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize