i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
