Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
