My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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