He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
