if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
