my mouth tastes like poor choices
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
