I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Enjoy the penises
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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