And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
