Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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