I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
