the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
