I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
