They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
