Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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