Its about making memories worth repressing
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
