He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
