It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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