I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize