When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize