His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
His nipple licking is glorious
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize