Plan B is the new Plan A
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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