wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
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