guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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