no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
